last week's recap

1st thing on my mind...everytime i thought i'm lost forever.. He's always jz a prayer away..bener2 too good for me :)

mo ke gereja hr ini ada demo lg *alesan abeesss :P *.. dan ga bangun dong!! gile deh.. capenya kurang tidur bbrp ari + lari2/sauna2 ngerjain si bebek/beli karcis/ntn davinci hahaha wut a week :) it was fun indeed.. God is really full of unexpected things :)

kamis kmrn ke date lagi (stlh kerja keras nyiram si bebek.. oh ember oh ember.. INDAHNYA SI EMBERRRR..whoever put that thing next to me.. GOD BLESS YOU !! HEUAHEUEHUHEA)..sempet berguru sedikit ma dewa bass :) dipinjemin buku basic bass.. adoh stlh 4 taon maen bass dng avoiding baca any theories, not balok, dan pake otak gw.. kayanya ga bisa menghindar lg neh hueaheuaheu..gpp de..anything for the glory of the Lord.. jd gw berniat latian + improve my stagnant skills :)
trus gw jg diberkati.. topik sharing kmrn itu membuka mata gw banget..
gw musti belajar jadi lebih open minded, sabar, accepting dan less selfish :)
makasih Tuhan, udah disadarkan..

trus kmrn ntn davinci code ma anak2 hotex.. beli puzzle lagi hohoww.. serbu rotiboy *NYUMMYYYYY* and had a long conversation over a cold banana mocha frappuchino w/ si bebek :D .. rasanya dah lama ga ngobrol2 panjang lebar ma tuh mahluk.. kynya gara2 dia cuti+training semingguan gitu.. trus lg heboh2 gitu di *bucks.. di sblh kita ada org duduk, cewe2 gt de.. gw ga sadar.. stlh ga lama ricky dtg..ee itu istrinya ricky heuaehue *oopss.. si bebek jg ga nyadar.. wkt itu dia ketemunya cm bntar seh.. dasar tuh anak..* gw jg ngerasa cupu ga sadar.. utg dia org jg cuek2 aja..jd kita lanjut lg.. hueheuahuea

hoahm..mgg dpn bakal full deh.. semoga kerjaan menyurut *tho very unlikely hahaha
bersyukur dah at least i hv smth 2 do.. musti fitness lg neh... ufh.. been slacking off way too much lately :)

oh negara ini..

kenapa yah dunia ini dipenuhi oleh orang2 yg merasa dirinya pintar..padahal kenyataannya berbeda?
kenapa yah dunia ini dipenuhi orang2 yg ignorant, gak peduli terhadap sesama, gak perduli lingkungan?
kenapa yah negara ini begitu susah di-fix? dari atas sampe bawah keropos, karatan, basi..
rakyat gak bisa disalahkan.. pola pikir mrk terbentuk dari lingkungan.. keadaan yg diciptakan oleh pemerintah.. yg kerjanya makan gaji buta.. sidang = tidur siang?
konon istilahnya sih wakil rakyat..

wakil rakyat.. ha ha ha.. istilah yg palsu..
rakyat menderita bahan bakar naik, "wakil rakyat" tak sungkan menuntut kenaikan gaji..

rakyat susah cari uang, kadang hanya cukup untuk ongkos tak cukup untuk makan.. inflasi.. "wakil rakyat" ribut soal downsizing mobil dinas.. bisa sampe jadi "wakil rakyat" aja berarti minimal mobil 3 kan, pak?

inflasi gak pernah berenti, semua naik, upah tetep kecil dan standard hidup rendah.. "wakil rakyat" revisi uu tenaga kerja konon utk menguntungkan pengusaha.. kira2 kalau pengusaha untung, "wakil rakyat" juga ikut untung kan? begitu gampangnya menginjak rakyat kecil.. bukannya mencari penyelesaian yg kreatif, efektif dan kondusif.. malah ambil jalan singkat.. khas Indonesia deh.. malas mencari tempat parkir, berenti saja di pinggir jalan.. mengambil 1 jalur dan menyebabkan macet? ah.. gak peduli tuh.. toh polisi juga diam saja.. mending jalanan di Indonesia gak perlu dikasih garis2 pembatas atau rambu2 deh.. percuma.. jadi pajangan, gak ada gunanya.. mending uang utk bikin rambu/cat jalan buat kasih makan orang.. kali masih lebih berguna..
dan kalo dah ga jelas gitu.. mayan lah.. kali2 aja polisi kita akhirnya beneran jadi polisi..

waktu rakyat dirugikan karena korupsi, kolusi, nepotisme yg tidak habis2.. keadaan negara yg tidak aman.. kemunafikan mengatasnamakan agama di mana2.. masalah2 vital dan fatal.. "wakil rakyat" sibuk mencabut identitas wanita Indonesia..
rasanya R.A Kartini, Dewi Sartika, dan semua pahlawan wanita Indonesia udah guling2 di kuburnya.. sia2 aja mrk berjuang.. sia2 mrk menderita.. munafik kita mengajarkan di sekolah2 ttg perjuangan mereka..

bener kata salah satu artis di tv tadi.. kita skrg memang masih hidup dlm penjajahan..
bkn penjajahan bangsa asing.. tapi penjajahan KEBODOHAN..

susah susah..
kalo kata Remy Sylado, memang kali musti ganti nama.. ikutin adat istiadat org Jawa or Cina yg kalo keberatan nama, mending diganti aja drpd tar kaya negara ini.. sakit.. rusak.. bobrok.. keropos ga jelas..

sigh.. mending "wakil rakyat" nya dikasih tau deh.. jgn ngurusin perut sendiri.. jgn munafik mengatasnamakan agama.. lebih baik urusi rakyat yg konon diwakilkan... gak bisa makan.. gak bisa sekolah.. boro2 naek mobil.. boro2 minta naek gaji..

Tuhan, Tuhan.. mau jadi apa negara ini?

uttering thanks

a recap of what life has been these past few months..

God has managed to find me again.. i don't know how.. i don't how when and most importantly, i don't know why.. why does He care so much? all i know is i'm more than eternally grateful for His loyalty, steadfastness, grace and unlimited love.
i know i don't deserve it and i know it will take me a while to fully recover. but i know i'll get there someday, with Him by my side.

the many blessings are endless! apart from the few pleasant surprises at work and a new found respect and love for a dear friend, i can thankfully say that i'm slowly but surely getting closer to my lifelong target. it takes plenty of hard work and there are times when i think i'll give in altogether. but the past 2 months have shown me that i indeed can achieve anything i want, as long as i do my best and let God do the rest.

i'm still trying and i still fail in some cases, but i won't give up. as long as i have Him, i know i'll be just fine :)

looking forward to the other surprises He has in store for me. and as for the matters at heart which He only knows about, i think i'll just leave it in His capable hands ;)

like ecclesiastes said, there's a season for everything under the sun ;)

what an awesome God we have :)

when..

when will it come.. when will it happen.. when will i know.. when will i feel..

when..

revealing weekend

it has been a revealing weekend..
it took me about a day to really process the things that happened..
the secrets revealed made me see things in a different way..

was i disappointed? no..
it was more like "i would have never suspected it"
maybe i was too naive? maybe my expectations are too high?

in the end.. i'm just glad that this was the weekend i chose to go back to church..
i need Him now more than ever..
and everything seems to keep showing that i just have to hang on to Him, the only constant, sure thing in my life..

then, after hours of digesting the information..
i also came to the conclusion that all things .. and i mean every single little thing.. that happened in my life, happened because He has a divine purpose behind it..

yes it's obvious and it's been repeated so many times it has now become a cliche..
but how many of us really acknowledge and understand it, and see it really happening in our daily lives.. realizing every moment of it?

things that may be considered as inconvenience, things that may seem less pleasant in life.. are there because they need to be there..
one day, some day.. you'll look back and realize its significance..
i see that now.. and to that i say "thank You, Lord.."

sunday

i'm bored out of my mindddddddddd....................

nonsense

this post will be totally nonsense.. i have nothing particular to share.. nothing important to say.. no strands of thoughts drifting out of my brain that needs to be put in writing.. i just want to write..

let's see.. life is so-so right now.. i'm in the danger of falling into daily routines so bad that i'm thinking of taking up various classes..
took up violin lessons.. and now thinking of taking up painting..but where's the time for it all..

i need a change.. but the need for it is being gradually supressed by the fact that i'm not a morning person and have serious problems with getting up early in the morning.. so the current situation is very accomodating.. the promise of the future vs the comfort of the present.. tough one..

all in all.. my mood has been improving lately.. still not the best of moods, but getting there..so things don't seem so somber anymore..

i wonder what tomorrow will bring..